Why Would Anyone Do That? (Listen to 60’s Music)

The other day, whilst whipping up this bourgeois gastric delight from the last century, I thought why not dip further into nostalgia and listen to music of that same era? So I turned on the Old Fogey Station and as I chopped and sauted and opened cans, I happened to take a good listen to some of the crap with which we used to numb our brains.

Depending on which part of the country you hail from, you will refer to the plebian delight pictured here as either goulash (preferred), or Johnny Marzetti (Midwestern) or Chili Mac (Texas, maybe?). It’s has been around forever, a dish full of stuff, and was especially popular in the fifties and sixties. I am including one of six thousand recipes for it at the bottom of this post, in DIY casual instructions.

Back to the music, here are seven of my observations about some sexist and/or dumb lyrics I heard.

First up: Wives and Lovers, written by Burt Bacharach.

For wives should always be lovers too
Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you
I’m warning you…

Day after day
There are girls at the office
And men will always be men
Don’t send him off with your hair still in curlers
You may not see him again

Thanks, Burt, for this lovely chauvinistic message. I’m sure it inspired a lot of women to go out and buy more of your crappy music.

Sure I sent him off to the office still in curlers but at least I have good hair! What’s with that sausage-roll flippy thing you’re sportin’ there?

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Next! Under My Thumb, The Rolling Stones

It’s down to me, yes it is
The way she does just what she’s told
Down to me, the change has come
She’s under my thumb

Under my thumb
A siamese cat of a girl
Under my thumb
She’s the sweetest, hmmm, pet in the world

Mick Jagger was in favor of “The Rolling Misogynists” but was voted down 4 to 1.

Geez, Mick, what will the neighbors think?

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And here’s You’re Havin’ My Baby, by Paul Anka (and this is too bad, because I really like you Paul, but this rates an 8 on the Suck-O-Meter).

Havin’ my baby
What a lovely way of sayin’
How much you love me
Havin’ my baby
What a lovely way of sayin’
What you’re thinkin’ of me
I can see it, face is glowin’
I can see in your eyes
I’m happy you know it

Because, Paul, it’s all about you, isn’t it?

Yeah, Paul, it was fine when it was just a baby bump but now that I’m the size of a VW Beetle you’re sorta changin’ your mind now, aren’t ya?

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Next up, If You Wanna Be Happy by Jimmy Soul. You knew this one was coming, didn’t you?

If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty women your wife
Go for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

Don’t let your friends tell you you have no taste
go ahead and marry anyway
Her face is ugly her eyes don’t match
take it from me shes a better catch

Oh, Jimmy Soul. You didn’t make old bones but if you had, some woman would have killed you by now anyway. RIP, but Dude, what a nasty song.

Who’s ugly now, Jimmy, you two-hit wonder!

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Ah, sweet Donovan, how we loved ya’. That is until we listened, really listened, to what you were saying to us.

Superman or Green Lantern ain’t got a-nothin’ on me
I can make like a turtle and dive for your pearls in the sea, yeah!
A you-you-you can just sit there a-thinking on your velvet throne
’bout all the rainbows a-you can a-have for your own
When you’ve made your mind up forever to be mine
I’ll pick up your hand and slowly blow your little mind
When you’ve made your mind up forever to be mine

Slowly “blow your little mind”? Little mind? Um, I think, lovely Donovan, that perchance it’s you with the little mind, given your penchant for the cannabis.

Maybe I should have tried to find a two-syllable word other than “little”.

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Next is Cherish, by the Association.

Oh, I could say I need you, but then you’d realize
That I want you, just like a thousand other guys
Who’d say they loved you with all the rest of their lies
When all they wanted was to touch your face, your hands
And gaze into your eyes

Who wants to bet that they have more on their minds (these thousand other guys) than touching your face and your hands and gazing? Even back then, I don’t recall this scenario. Oh, you say, this is the third-grade? Oh, well then.

Funny, this look worked for the Beatles but we’re not getting anywhere with it.

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And now, Do You Love Me, by the Contours.

You broke my heart
‘Cause I couldn’t dance
You didn’t even want me around
And now I’m back, to let you know
I can really shake ’em down

Do you love me? (I can really move)
Do you love me? (I’m in the groove)
Ah do you love? (Do you love me)
Now that I can dance (dance)

Listen up. Any wench who dumps you because you can’t dance ain’t worth learning to do the shimmy-shimmy for.

Look, I can dance! You can’t see it but I’m doing the whirly thing with my hands. I’m the one with no partner!

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Last but CERTAINLY not least, Next Door to an Angel by the ever-annoying and always-slimy Neil Sedaka.

Do do do, doobie bop bop, oh do bop she don don
Doobie bop bop, oh do bop she don don
Doobie bop bop, oh do bop she don don
Doobie bop bop, oh do bop she don don

I took a look and oh what a shock
to find a little bit of heaven right on the block.
I’m living right next door to an angel
and I’m gonna make that angel mine.

I can’t believe that this is the girl next door,
her funny little face isn’t funny no more,
sixteen and oh what a dream, ain’t it strange
how she changed into such a lovely angel.

Do you know where your sixteen-year-old angels are?

Mmm, it’s a little bit of heaven living right next door to an angel. Did I say, mmm?

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And now for that recipe:

Goulash (aka Johnny Marzetti and Chili Mac) is a combination of pasta, meat, flavorings and tomato stuff. Makes one of those 9 X 13 baking dishes full of good eatin’.
Pasta: Elbow macaroni or whatever you have. Cook 1 pound, make sure it’s al dente since it will cook further.
Meat: Hamburger and/or sweet Italian sausage. Whatever amounts you want but not more than 1.5 lb total.
Flavorings: Any combination, of onions (one medium), green pepper (one medium) and mushrooms (8 oz.) depending upon personal preference. Mushrooms need to be sauteed first since they throw off so much water.
Tomato stuff: One can diced tomatoes, and jarred or canned spaghetti sauce. This dish isn’t worth using up homemade sauce for.

Cook up the meat with the onion and peppers and drain. Mix in tomatoes, optional sauteed mushrooms and jar/canned sauce till it looks like a big slug of chili. Mix in enough pasta that it looks right, being careful not to over-pasta-ize since it swells up as it cooks and can take over your kitchen. Don’t forget to salt and pepper to taste (whatever that means). Other cool stuff you can add: parmesan cheese and Italian seasoning. I guess that’s “to taste” also. Just dump some in. Slop this into a baking dish and cover with cheddar cheese. You know the little shards that come in a bag with the texture of cardboard? That stuff. I think it keeps the moisture in or something but really, it isn’t edible. Bake covered for a while, maybe while you drink your first martini, then uncover. Make a second martini and consume it. When done, so is dinner. Good luck because by now you might be too shitfaced to eat it. If so, stick it in the refrigerator and nuke it later, but beware that the stuff on the top does not improve with nuking.

I apologize for the length of this post, but I didn’t count the lyrics. So taking that reduction into account, I am well below the word limit.

17 thoughts on “Why Would Anyone Do That? (Listen to 60’s Music)

  1. Hi Lynn, yes, well put, confirming that we women are just a speck of dust in the lives of men, ha. On the other hand, I bet you could find just as many lyrics that put the love object on a pedestal, demonstrating the old and infamous Freudian dichotomy of a certain generation of men seeing women only within the two categories: the less than equal woman that can be treated as a whore versus the virginal better-than-me-I-don’t-deserve-her beauty.
    It will take more than a few generations to see changes happening, but I do see changes in my daughter’s generation…..
    Johanna

    • Even back then there was a variety. They weren’t all like the ones I’ve listed here, these were just some I noticed. It put me on a path of searching for sexist ads in the 60’s (to illustrate) and I thought about how things really haved changed a lot since then. All good.

  2. We called it ‘Hotdish’ when I grew up.

    Yes, those songs were real winners. Luckily we’ve advanced so much today. Now we have song after song about women as strippers shaking their asses. Really lovely stuff.

    • I’m afraid I don’t know too much about today’s music. I tend to ignore it for the reasons you’ve cited here. I keep waiting for Rap to die out but it doesn’t seem to want to go away. The lyrics back then might have been dumb but that’s all. Not like now..

      • It doesn’t even have to be rap music. Even pop groups like Maroon Five can’t keep the f-bombs out of their lyrics. I’m no prude–they can sing what they like; if it’s got a great beat, I’ll still listen–but there are some things you don’t need to hear with your kids in the car…

  3. Hi Lynn, I have to disagree with you this time. The lyrics you chose were crappy HOWEVER, I managed rock bands in Vietnam during the ’60’s and I thought the music was terrific. I’ve cut and pasted an excerpt from my book which refers to the music at that time.

    Pre-booking shows, I traveled on ahead of the group, and tried to spend at least one night checking on them in each camp. We were seldom in Saigon, and when we were, there was laundry and friends to catch up with.
    The band performed all the current hits. That fabulous 60’s music with its demanding beat- its surge of life; they played it to perfection, bringing the GI’s to their feet, capturing the moment as they belted it out.
    Songs like;
    Chain, Chain, Chain, Chain of Fools.
    Mustang Sally – All you wanta do is ride around Sally,…………
    Born To Be Wild
    Just Give Me Money – that’s what I want.
    Here We Come Now, Say Mony Mony.
    I Can’t Get No Satisfaction… But I tried, and I tried, and I tried.
    My Baby Just Wrote Me a Letter…. I don’t care how much money…
    I’m Leaving on a Jet Plane
    Running Through The Jungle
    R.E.S.P.E.C.T. Wow, Aretha Franklin was HOT. And how about Wilson Pickett doing his ‘Mashed Potato.”
    Every show finished with the same song; “WE GOTTA GET OUTTA THIS PLACE – If it’s the last thing we ever do.” This song became the GI’s national anthem. By the time that number was played, there was never a soul sitting. Every man in the room stood tall, punching the air and screaming the words. “WE GOTTA GET OUTTA THIS PLACE” They stood on tables, stood on chairs, hung from the rafters –the noise swelling like a huge wave, swamping one and all in a fervent crescendo “WE GOTTA GET OUTTA THIS PLACE.”… 50,000 of them never did.

    CATCH YOUR NEXT POST……………………..June

    • June, of course you are right. I was thinking about mentioning some of the good stuff of the sixties but the post just got too long. The Beatles, The Beach Boys, The Four Seasons, Neil Diamond. And I forgot about We Gotta Get Out of This Place. That was great! I just happened to notice these songs that day.

  4. Loved this! Never gave much thought to those lyrics – see them in a whole new light, once I can read them. When the songs played, it wasn’t always clear what was being said (especially by Mick Jagger!!)! Just enjoyed the beat and hummed along with the music, mouthing whatever words I knew. The goulash recipe is a bit different from mine – only fry the ground beef, add can(s) of diced/crushed tomatoes, some catsup, BBQ sauce, salt & pepper, then the pasta. No cheese on ours, and no baking – although I like the idea of passing the baking time with a glass or two of wine! May have to change my recipe to accommodate that particular activity!! Thanks!

    • I notice lyrics. If they are stupid, I don’t like the song, no matter how good it might be otherwise.

      No baking? I didn’t know you could make it without baking. The cheese on the top could also be replaced with other stuff, bread crumbs etc. I think that was to keep the moisture in while baking so if you don’t bake it, no need for that.

      Yeah, I’ve never had a martini in my life. They look like they’d be gross, especially with olives. Ech.

  5. I think the Rolling Stones one is about the role reversal of a previously dominant woman, but written as a joke, or something along those lines. I did like the accomanying picture you chose. It made me laugh.

  6. WONDERFUL post. I loved it. Two of my favorites were “It’s My Party And I’ll Cry If I Want To” followed by “Now It’s Judy’s Turn To Cry.” WHY did they both want this guy? Johnny only had to sit and wait for them to fight over him!

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